Imagine a child standing alone in the pouring rain. All the other children are taking shelter from the rain under a bright and colorful umbrella. The child who is now soaked doesn’t smile or frown, or show any other emotion. All the other children are sharing secrets and smiling.The child standing alone has no idea how to converse with the others. The child also doesn’t know how to enjoy the company of the other kids.

The above scene defines emotional delay in a nutshell. Children who are experiencing emotional delays find it hard to express emotions, formulate friendships, or handle social interactions. The problem with children experiencing emotional delays is that they struggle when it comes to identifying the emotions of others. As such, these children tend to be estranged from others.

While children do experience emotional awareness at different stages, many children do face emotional delays and the best way to support your child in their emotional development journey is to detect and support these emotional delays at once.

Detecting Emotional Delays 

The best way to get kids to become more in tune with their emotions and those of others is to help them to become emotionally intelligent. But first you need to assess your child to see if there are any signs of emotional delay. 

Look out for kids who are:

• Always on the outside: If a child has difficulty interacting with other children and always seems to be on the outside of the play circle, he or she may be experiencing emotional delays.
• Regularly struggling to calm down: Children who throw frequent tantrums and display difficulty in terms of calming down when they experience an overwhelming situation are unable to grasp their own emotions.
• Not empathetic and understanding of the feelings of others: Kids who are not at all empathetic and are oblivious to the feelings of others cannot process their own emotions or understand the emotions of others.
• Reluctant to embrace new situations: Little kids generally do find it overwhelming when situations change or when they have to adapt to something entirely new. Children experiencing emotional delays find it extremely frustrating in unfamiliar situations. Pure meltdowns may be experienced by children who battle to process emotions.
• Unable to express feelings: Even when you try to get your kid to process feelings and label them, children who handle emotional delays are unable to find words for their emotions and they cannot describe their feelings.

The signs will provide insight as to whether a child is experiencing emotional delays. Sometimes, however, the same signs are shown by a child who is reserved. If you are unsure whether your child is experiencing emotion delays or not, we suggest you look at some behavioral clues.

It becomes easier to tell if your child is finding it hard to grasp and express emotions if:

• Your child showcases limited range of emotions. Children who are not meeting emotional developmental milestones have a limited range of emotions and don’t show the right emotional expressions when they are experiencing strong feelings.
• Your child cannot process the emotions of others or finds it hard to share toys or objects with other children.
• Your child battles when it comes to soothing himself or herself down and your child feels as if the world is coming to an end if a small incident occurs.
• Your little one struggles with basic activities such as stacking blocks
• Your child finds it hard to adapt to social situations and cannot seem to engage easily in conversations that entail the use of verbal or non verbal communication skills.

Knowing these red flags is great as they can give you an idea as to whether your child is meeting emotional development milestones. Parents know their children well and will get a feeling if kids are not responding appropriately in highly stressful situations or if they are having difficulties during interactions with other children. It is perfectly fine to ask for help from the experts if you are unsure of the signs.

Why Should You Support Kids with Emotional Development?

Different children experience different delays in terms of meeting milestones. However, child development is affected if a child experiences emotional delays.

• Academic upsets can arise: Children who cannot express emotions and who cannot self regulate experience upsets in the classroom when learning becomes frustrating for them. These kids will not know how to express their emotions when they find learning too overwhelming.
• Social relationship struggles: Kids who cannot express their emotions find it hard to form relationships and may feel isolated when they try to be friends with others. The social awkwardness can continue and get worse as the child grows.
• Self-esteem problems arise: These children may struggle with low self-esteem and in turn a negative self-image too. 
• Anxiety rises: As the child grows, the child may become more anxious and find emotional resilience particularly tiresome.

How to Support Children Who Experience Emotional Delays?

Early detection can lead to early intervention which is great. The sooner you choose to support your child to achieve this milestone, the easier your journey will be.

• Therapy: It is important to seek help from a professional therapist such as a play therapist, occupational therapist, or a speech therapist. Therapy is a great way to rectify certain aspects of the problem like the inability to communicate or the unwillingness to play with other children. Therapists understand all sorts of developmental delays and are better equipped to deal with children experiencing any sort of delays.
• Children’s life coach: Therapy is great, however, so too is roping in a children’s life coach. The life coach will be able to work with your child to set social and academic goals that are realistic and based on the child’s character. In this way, children have something to work towards both socially and academically.
• Parental support and intervention: Parents need to step in and show their children what is acceptable behavior in different situations and how to react in different situations. Parents also need to teach their kids about what certain emotions mean and ways to recognize how a person is feeling. Creating a stimulating environment at home whereby social interaction is encouraged is another great strategy.
• Explain empathy and role model responses: Parents can use emotion cards or toys to explain the concept of empathy and they can role model acceptable responses when someone is feel sad or angry. Role modeling is a great way to show children how to act socially as they inevitably do tend to mimic their parents.
• Welcoming physical activity in the routine: It is a good idea for parents to create some type of routine for the child. However, it is equally important for parents to introduce physical activity and exercise into their child’s structured routine. Children who face developmental delays will benefit from exercising as their gross motor skills and coordination will improve. Physical activity done with others will teach children the essence of teamwork and how to interact with others socially.
• Speaking to educators: Parents who are certain of their child’s emotional delay must liaise with their child’s teacher. Hand in hand, the teacher and educator can share their observations and somewhat create a specific learning program for the child.
• Don’t shy away from group interactions: Your child may find it overwhelming to be in the presence of other people or may feel anxious in group settings. The best way to get your child to open up and embrace group settings is by taking them to events where many people are gathered. You need to create those opportunities where your child can meet other children and you need to guide your child to formulate friendships with others. Introduce your child to other children and encourage him or her to talk.

Hands-on Parenting

If your child is experiencing emotional delays and doesn’t seem to fit in with other children, don’t beat yourself  up about it. Every child is unique and there is no one size fits all mould when it comes to children. With the right support, structure and guidance your child will be able to thrive in any social setting.

Being proactive in your child’s emotional development journey is one of the most important things that you can do for your child. You also need to show empathy when working with your child and understand that your child may not always react in the way you expect. It is a slow journey, but with the right support child development will occur.

Always ask for support. Rely on research or speak to cognitive behavioral therapists and other professions to find out how to support your child and what more you can do. It does take a village to raise a child so don’t shy away from roping in the whole village to help your child overcome this delay.